My Refrigerator Has Left Me Loony
August 20th, 2008 at 12:04 am by --KALEB NATION--
After turning in my manuscript on Monday, I decided it was time to slowly return from my zombie-writer state and begin the metamorphosis into Human before class starts on Friday. Part of this includes eating regular meals that do not entirely consist of delivery pizza, delivery Mexican food or tuna helper.
Unfortunately, I go to my fridge, and see this:
Including food and snacks hidden in my closet, I currently own a grand total of:
2 cans of tuna
1 box of ham
1 bag swiss cheese
1 half-empty box of cereal (no milk)
2 Eclipse mints
The problem with all of these is that none of them are quite big enough to make a meal that will put a dent in my hunger. That, combined with being exhausted after editing 120,000+ words multiples of times, has left me slightly loony.
Of course, as fate always goes, the night before I was turning the book in, I found a minor mishap in a sub-storyline, which is code for ‘a small plot hole’ when I don’t want to admit to it. It is not the best of feelings to arrive home at 6 PM to read the final 60 pages of your manuscript only to find that yes, there is something that needs to be fixed; yes, it is something important; and yes, you only have 6 hours in which to do it.
The good thing about finding minor mishaps in a sub-storyline is that sometimes, they lead you in a better direction than you were before. I discovered that by fixing this problem, I also was able to have a villain double-crossed, which is one of the most fun things to write, (second only to a secret door). Example:
“Here you are, massster,” hissed Earnoggin, dropping a box onto Dr. Steinsnot’s lab desk. “The brains of every citizen in all of town. Now, give me my freedom.”
Dr. Steinsnot looked over the brains, and then shrugged.
“First go put them down the brain-chute, from which nothing escapes.” he ordered.
Earnoggin quickly grabbed the box and went to the chute to dump them. But, the moment his back was turned, Dr. Steinsnot suddenly gave him a sharp kick, and sent him sprawling down the chute as well.
“Silly Earnoggin,” Dr. Steinsnot said with a cackle.
Dr. Steinsnot apparently just double-crossed the unknowing Earnoggin, by tossing him down the brain-chute and not giving him his freedom.
For those of you who haven’t seen it yet, I just installed a new chat on my other site and sometimes I drop in to talk with people. Wish me luck because school starts Friday!
August 20th, 2008 at 2:35 am
That picture of the refrigeratore looks strangely familiar; wonder why is that so..? It must remind me of MY fridge when I skip the trip to the supermarket for too long
it’s even small as mine!
I like that way to correct your “minor mishap”; this villain double-crossing thing looks quite satisfying, I must say
August 20th, 2008 at 7:15 am
Luck!!!
clean up the fridge will ya..
August 20th, 2008 at 8:07 am
Ok, we get it. You’re “tired”.
Eat, sleep, get refreshed, cause we want to hear ALL about it! Howd’ it go finishing up the revisions? Are you feeling good about all the things you had to cut? When do you expect to hear back from the editor?
Congrats, btw!
Oh, and one more thing you should do when you are a famous writer is hire yourself an assistant to do yur dishes and laundry and keep your fridge stocked. I know that’s on my list!
August 20th, 2008 at 9:38 am
School starts Thursday unless you randomly switched schools this summer.
August 20th, 2008 at 10:47 am
lol I think we need to lock you in a grocery store for a few hours.
What is it with college students and having NO FOOD?! My older sister always comes home and goes straight to the kitchen. When I go to her house and try to steal some of her goodies, there’s NOTHING. She always eats at work. lol The most food I’ve ever seen in her fridge at once was when she got to take home food from a catering job…
Congrats on finishing the editing, Kaleb! All that worrying over nothing.
I can’t wait to read the finished product! lol You live near me, so if I ever see you on the street, I’m going to get you to sign it. If I don’t have the book with me… you’re going to come with me to go get it. lol =]
August 20th, 2008 at 8:43 pm
Wow, after days of being a zombie shut-in you’re finally done! Congradulations!
August 20th, 2008 at 10:30 pm
Congrats on finishing the manuscript! *round of applause* Hopefully you won’t starve with such low amount of food. Good luck with schoo;!
August 21st, 2008 at 9:49 am
I know what you mean by how fun it is to write villains being double-crossed. I’ve got some of that in my book and it’s my favorite mini-plot in the whole thing!
And…
Yay! You finished editing! Congratulations!
August 21st, 2008 at 3:30 pm
Well, good luck starting school without food or sleep!! That outa be fun… You she get people to start sending you canned foods
Then maybe you’d have more for your poor tummy
August 21st, 2008 at 5:10 pm
Have fun at school, Kaleb!
(and, yes, it IS possible to have fun at school)
Congratulations at getting your book all edited by the time you wanted to. Hopefully you won’t have to cut any more out of it.
The mysteries of a refrigerator. Where does the food go? And, how are we all so certain the refrigerator hasn’t eaten the stored food?? (which would explain the lack of snacks at your place)
August 22nd, 2008 at 12:03 am
[...] edits turned in and finally getting to see The Dark Knight. So whilst sitting here at home with a nearly empty refrigerator, I am hoping that reading New Moon will help distract me from my maddening hunger just long enough [...]
August 22nd, 2008 at 6:37 am
[...] edits turned in and finally getting to see The Dark Knight. So whilst sitting here at home with a nearly empty refrigerator, I am hoping that reading New Moon will help distract me from my maddening hunger just long enough [...]
August 22nd, 2008 at 10:12 am
Haha, that’s like the fridge at my dad’s house.
Are you sure the cereal box isn’t half full?
August 22nd, 2008 at 11:07 am
Anna: “That’s his REFRIGERATOR?”
Me: Yeah. *nods solemnly*
Anna: Scary.
August 22nd, 2008 at 5:20 pm
look Kaleb… that really is not healthy… lol i am worried about your health!! well go shopping or something!! ( scolds Kaleb ) that is not ok Kaleb! Now get your butt to a store and get some real food!! ( no poptarts no matter how yummy they are!! XD )
now go shopping Love,
Cullen_Coven_Girl
August 22nd, 2008 at 7:14 pm
What does the sign in your fridge say?
August 22nd, 2008 at 9:35 pm
Emily, I think that might be that one sign to the Lasagna Burglar…
August 24th, 2008 at 7:31 pm
Kaleb, it’s time for you to go to Stop and Shop.
August 25th, 2008 at 6:22 am
It’s times like these that make me glad that I live with my parents…If I was in charge of feeding myself, I’d die. I get too distracted by writing to do anything else.
Do us all a favor and don’t starve!
August 26th, 2008 at 12:52 am
My roommates and I realized the other day that our entire kitchen contained three half-empty bottles of Bacardi, some Easymac, and a jar of mustard, plus some nearly-stale coffee and a jar of tea bags, so I’d say you’ve got one up on us. Yay college!
August 28th, 2008 at 10:48 am
But you should no longer be going hungry, because you bought two lasagnas and (as of Monday) they are still safe inside your freezer.
Much love,
The Girls in the Fireplace
(idefine777 and tophatpunkergrl)
September 1st, 2008 at 6:05 pm
Well….
that sucks.
October 10th, 2008 at 4:24 pm
Oh no! D:
Please don’t starve. Who would post on the blogs then? Who would sign our copies of Bran Hambric when he becomes famous? So yeah, please eat. XD
January 7th, 2009 at 5:17 pm
Ha ha, I can still see the sign you put up for the Lasagna Burgalar. -giggle-